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On air Overnight Jawlines

--:--:-- UK

Politics

A mild man in a beige suit calmly bites a white-bread cheese sandwich while a scrum of press photographers and boom microphones crowds in on him

PM Dave Beige seen eating a sandwich. "TELLING," say sources

Cheese. White bread. No comment. Victoria Cheekbone-Smythe on the lunch Downing Street hoped you wouldn't notice.

5 Oct 2026

A white air-source heat pump glowing beside the wooden garden gate of a brick semi-detached house at dusk, a startled gas boiler visible in the window above

Heat pumps: they're coming for your BOILER

It hums. It watches. It knows you're in the kitchen. Victoria Cheekbone-Smythe on the quiet white box at the garden gate.

5 Oct 2026

Victoria Cheekbone-Smythe, a platinum-haired presenter in a navy blazer, leans across a studio desk towards a single banana sitting upright in the guest chair with a tiny clip-on microphone

BENDY BANANAS are back, claims Victoria's source (a banana)

As rejoin talk returns, our political editor secures an exclusive with the one fruit that remembers. It would not go on the record.

5 Oct 2026

A row of military drones along the white cliffs of Dover while parakeets fly between them

SHOULD WE BUILD AN AI DRONE WALL? We're just asking

Operation Feathered Shield: £4bn of drones "working", says source, as parakeets fly through the gaps.

5 Oct 2026

BREAKING

PM SEEN EATING SANDWICH. "TELLING"

Cheese "mild", confirms Downing Street

bbnews.co.uk

Latest

Drone wall trials "going well", say dronesWeather: cloudy, with a chance of grievanceOfcom receives 9,000 complaints about a jawCheekbone index up 14% on the yearDiesel passes £2 a litre for the first timePigeons demand "an honest conversation"GOOD NEWS: your phone will now scan for small boats, says Rex (it won't)Storm Beatriz crossing the Atlantic UNCHECKED, warns Storm MandibleSPECIAL CHISELLING OPERATION enters day 214 as Softjaw seen eating soup "in a provocative manner"HISTORIC: royal seen holding umbrella. We go live to the umbrellaPM Dave Beige seen eating a sandwich. "TELLING," say sources"It is not a bribe. It is a DIVIDEND": Emperor of Greatagain promises every subject $5,000Heat pumps: they're coming for your BOILEREXPOSED: grey squirrels came from America in 1876. Brock demands a points-based system for rodents

Drone wall trials "going well", say dronesWeather: cloudy, with a chance of grievanceOfcom receives 9,000 complaints about a jawCheekbone index up 14% on the yearDiesel passes £2 a litre for the first timePigeons demand "an honest conversation"GOOD NEWS: your phone will now scan for small boats, says Rex (it won't)Storm Beatriz crossing the Atlantic UNCHECKED, warns Storm MandibleSPECIAL CHISELLING OPERATION enters day 214 as Softjaw seen eating soup "in a provocative manner"HISTORIC: royal seen holding umbrella. We go live to the umbrellaPM Dave Beige seen eating a sandwich. "TELLING," say sources"It is not a bribe. It is a DIVIDEND": Emperor of Greatagain promises every subject $5,000Heat pumps: they're coming for your BOILEREXPOSED: grey squirrels came from America in 1876. Brock demands a points-based system for rodents