News GOOD NEWS: your phone will now scan for small boats, says Rex (it won't)
Device-level child safety rules are coming. BB News heard the word "scan" and immediately pointed its phone at a boating lake.
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News Storm Beatriz crossing the Atlantic UNCHECKED, warns Storm Mandible
Foreign rain, foreign wind and a name "nobody in Kent voted for". Our weatherman's quiff does not move.
News SPECIAL CHISELLING OPERATION enters day 214 as Softjaw seen eating soup "in a provocative manner"
Recessia's Supreme Chancellor was filmed with a spoon. Our man embedded behind a low wall says the soup "sent a message".
BB News poll
Are the ducks the real threat?
One vote per reader. Answers are anonymous.
Britain HISTORIC: royal seen holding umbrella. We go live to the umbrella
Lady Penelope Fawning has been standing beside it in the rain since 4am. "It has never looked more umbrella," she says.
Politics PM Dave Beige seen eating a sandwich. "TELLING," say sources
Cheese. White bread. No comment. Victoria Cheekbone-Smythe on the lunch Downing Street hoped you wouldn't notice.
News "It is not a bribe. It is a DIVIDEND": Emperor of Greatagain promises every subject $5,000
The Emperor pledges cash to every adult if his side wins the midterms. Rex Mandible calls it "the most generous thing anyone has ever promised".
Politics Heat pumps: they're coming for your BOILER
It hums. It watches. It knows you're in the kitchen. Victoria Cheekbone-Smythe on the quiet white box at the garden gate.
Opinion EXPOSED: grey squirrels came from America in 1876. Brock demands a points-based system for rodents
BB News can reveal a 150-year-old story. Brock Granite says what Victorian naturalists wouldn't.
Britain Ducks open café in Folkestone. Flat whites "suspiciously good"
Rex Mandible pressed his face to the window for three hours. The ducks offered him a croissant. He called it "a provocation".
Britain Diesel hits 200.01p. Rex fills up "for Britain", slowly, on camera
Record pump prices meet a man, a hatchback and a hand on his heart. Plus: this winter, mew to stay warm.
Opinion Brock launches Re-Chin UK, interviews himself about it, finds himself "very convincing"
A presenter. A party. A hard-hitting interview with the leader, who is also the presenter. Nobody has ever been tougher on Brock than Brock.
Politics BENDY BANANAS are back, claims Victoria's source (a banana)
As rejoin talk returns, our political editor secures an exclusive with the one fruit that remembers. It would not go on the record.
Opinion "Stop the birds": Brock's six-point plan
Point three is shouting at the sky. Point four is also shouting at the sky.